Wednesday, October 6, 2010

There is a hole in my heart

I'm not going to even try and say things are better or we are doing fine.  We aren't we are still in shock and our hearts are breaking.  I just wasn't to let her go, but deep down I knew this was coming.  I was just hoping...maybe this time I would be wrong.

We wrote an obituary today.  You sum up someone's life in 2 inches for 30.00 per inch.  To post a picture is an additional cost. That really makes you stop and think.  How could you begin to sum up what a person has done in your life others lives, what they have meant to you, how much they cared for others?  You can't. 

This song sums it all up for me.

Verse 1:

Lyrics..There's a Hole In My Heart

September sad and softly

Leaves are starting to fall

I recall, last time you were here

Your laughter a melody that lingers still


There's a hole in my heart

and I’ll carry it wherever I go

Like a treasure that travels

with me down every road

There's this longing lonesome ending

kind of bitter, kind of sweet

There's a hole in my heart

in the shape of you

Verse 2

Time steals so swiftly

Children having children of their own

and around life's merry-go round goes

and there you are wanting what you cannot hold


Verse 3

Even though my heart aches

There's a smile on my face

Just like a window to heaven

There's a light shining through

This hole in my heart

and so I carry it wherever I go

Like a treasure that travels

There's this longing lonesome ending

kind of bitter, kind of sweet

There's a hole in my heart

There's a hole in my heart

There's a hole in my heart

in the shape of you

Carol-the gardener


  1. I know exactly how u feel...It takes a long time for that hole to start closing up ... it will still be there it never goes away...I lost my husband 9 yrs. ago due to an accident...its one of the worst feelings one can ever experience....My heart goes out to you... I hope u have lots of family and close friends u can talk to...

  2. Carol, What a blessed life you have to have enjoyed the love of two mothers. My heart breaks for you at the loss of your 2nd mom, your aunt. I'll be praying for you today, for the Spirit to bring you comfort and the peace that passes understanding. If you will take a moment to be silent and reach out, I'm also sending you a warm hug across the distance and I believe it is strong enough to reach Florida. Hang in there, sweet lady, you are not going through this alone.


  3. Dear Carol,
    I'm so sorry for your loss - You are in my thoughts. I wish I had more comforting words for you (I'd love to be able to write something to take the pain away)... I just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you.


  4. "We wrote an obituary today. You sum up someone's life in 2 inches for 30.00 per inch. To post a picture is an additional cost. "

    I agree... everything is a revenue generator today... even obituaries. We used to have a neat newspaper in Jackson, MS... The Clarion Ledger... I say 'used to have' because they have changed...

    Each day, they would select an "Obituary Of The Day" and would lead with it... I'mnot making fun, but they would find one that seemed very interesting, and call and get more information on that person. I wrote my Dad's obituary... and at the funeral home during the visitation, someone from the newspaper called wanting more information... 'He sounds like he was such a character...' said the woman at the other end of the line as we talked about my Dad's Life.

    We can never sum up in words what another has meant to us... what another has done for us. For all of the times that she was there for you, she cared for you... a couple of inches of newsprint doesn't do it justice.

    Where you will show your Love for your Aunt Mildred is in photos that you will have around the house... and how you will never ever forget what she did for you.

    It's like when my friend, Robert, died in July... and I found this passage in a book that said something along the lines of... when a person dies and goes away... she takes a bit of us with her; in return, she leaves a bit of herself with you. You may not feel it now... you will never replace that hole... but at some point, you will smile through your tears when you think of her.

    Tomorrow is my Mother's birthday. I wrote her 'Birthday Post' last night, never mind that Mom's been gone way too long. I cried all the way through it... some of them were happy tears because I was fortunate enough to have had Her for my Mother.

    It just takes time, dear Carol...


  5. I'm so sorry about your aunt, Carol. I know how hard this is for you. Please take care and let me know if I can do anything for you.

  6. Sending you a big hug Carol, and hoping that things get better for you. Although we all know that we have to lose people at some point, it hurts like hell when we do.

    Celebrate your aunt's great life and all the love she gave to people... xxx

  7. This time I think Shoes said it better than I can. I wish that it were easier and it isn't. I am still praying for you and your family. I wish I could reach through this computer and hug you.

  8. I am so sorry for the loss of your aunt . . . I can feel the pain in your words and in the poem. I wish you comfort during the time that it takes to help you heal from your sorrow. The sun will shine again and she will be smiling down at you. Hugs and more hugs.